Sunday, October 28, 2012

26 days of thanks?

I try to join in the 30 days of thanks thingy that everyone does this time of year because it's really good to stop and think about what you are grateful for.  But I've missed a few days.  Honestly, though, since Hubby's heart attack, I do this every day, anyway.  I have so much and I'm very grateful.  Even the little things make me smile. 

I used to say when things went wrong, after whining about them (ugh), that, "At least none of us are sick.  We don't have kids with leukemia", things along those lines.  Our babies made it through pregnancy, delivery, and infancy without a hitch and other than their asthma that freaks me out when it gets bad, they have been healthy and strong, and are oh so smart!  Whiz kids, I've got here, if I do say so myself.  I'm so grateful for every second with them and I've loved them since I saw those silly, purple lines on a pregnancy test stick.

Hubby also freaks me out when he's not well, but still, even though his troubles have been ongoing and serious at times, because they scared me I appreciate him more and have felt even more thankful for him at those times.  We always mention his toes, now.  When we do, we are referring to the first e.r. the ambulance took him to the day of the heart attack, when he was lying on the gurney and the e.r. doc. was trying to fill me in on his situation before I'd even had a chance to get to my husband.  I saw the outline of his feet beneath the blue thermal blanket they had tucked around him and all I wanted was to at least get to those toes.  I inched my way over until I could reach them while the doctor talked, and would glance at my husband every now and then, still wanting to get to his face so I could kiss it.  One of the saddest things I've ever seen was his look of apology when our eyes would meet.  Kills me to think about.  He didn't have to speak to tell me at that moment that he was just plain sorry that we were there and that he'd caused us worry.  He wasn't scared or sad for himself, just for us.  An added bonus to just being grateful every time I see his sweet smile is that I don't fear the same silly things I used to, and I'm grateful for that, too. 

It's been a good year.  Life is unbelievably good.  I always felt that if things went well, we'd have to pay somehow, but I think we've paid our dues.  It's definitely getting easier to just enjoy life without waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I'm also, in this election time, more aware of my freedoms and how thankful I am for them, especially as a woman, knowing women before me worked hard to make it so that I can vote.  And how ridiculous is it that 100 yrs. ago women weren't even allowed to vote?!  If I only had a Tardis...

And now I am thinking how grateful I am that we have running water and electricity and heat and a freezer full of frozen food, because in a few days we might not.  This storm, Sandy, is missing us but smacking into a cold front that's coming our way which may bring snow, and as I always say, a hedgehog can't fart in the woods around here without knocking the power out, so we may be in for a crazy ride.  I have a pantry full of emergency water, however, and Hubby just cracked me up when he came home from a trip to town with two packages of store-bought sliced bread, of which I am very grateful, knowing I won't have to make bread this week, and two jars of jelly and a can of peanut butter.  So, worse comes to worst, we can eat pb&j sandwiches for a while and cook frozen food on the outdoor grill.  I'm thankful that we have almost a full tank of propane if we need it.  Oh, and one more thing I'm thankful for is camping supplies already packed for our upcoming Florida trip.  It's not often I have new flashlights and tons of back-up batteries ready and waiting in the sun room.  They will come in handy if the power does go out.

Now I wonder what I will be thankful for in a few days when the blogging bug hits again.  I hope it will be that we had enough snow to play in but not so much that we were sent back to the Dark Ages.

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